I had the most amazingly real dream the other night. It was so hot and awesomely awesome I'm not sure if I can even remember it, seemings it was almost a month ago. It felt as if they were touching me and I was touching them, everything was real. I awoke to find my arms clinging onto my doonah and even that felt so real. There was so much passion and love and tenison everything was so perfect and clear. Your arms cascaded over mine, over my body touching my face and then your lips leapt into mine it was truly beautiful. If only I knew who you were or how I could experience this again. I cannot explain how it happened or why. Alas I hope I do not forget or that it does never forget me. I really love writing, I cannot explain how it makes me feel to write a story to hear a story to be living a life in a story filled with other stories. I wish one could make a living off just writing things like this, like in the olden days where poems and stories and small securities could be let out into the world and be recognized. Now all thats left is meaningless blogs filled with meaningless words about somebodies day which will be repeated time and time again to the same bunch of people who have been sucked into living a lie that their dreams and goals cannot be reached so they make new ones. I am lucky not to have comprimised myself, I'm still going for the same things I wanted I'm following my dreams and I'm determined on getting there. Maybe thats whats different to the people who make it and the people who dont, determination, and alas great minds. I long to feel the subtle kiss of someone who loves me and that I actually love in return. I could never marry somebody that I didnt love, you could be the poorest man on the earth and it still wouldn't turn me off if you had the right personality. Maybe once this operation is done, or once I voice my opinion on wanting it to be done I could have that. Essentially I wanted someone who loved me for me but I'm getting this surgery for me. I really liked that boy at bunnings he was cute, even smiled at me it was nice. Nice to see that I could actually be appreciated. I hope I make everything I want I hope I be everything I want I hope I never compromise for anything I want overall I hope I make myself happy with the life that I choose to live. My writing is actually quite good, Jane Austen brings out the author in me. Too bad they arent appreciated anymore.
I think if anything was on repeat for long enough you would eventually get sick of it. Unless of course it is with an animal, one can never feel that for an animal.-C M Hayes.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
I think that people come and fade away like waves crashing against the coastal boat we have to throw ourselves into the blue and pray that we can keep our heads afloat. Because I've walked along beaches writing 'Save Our Souls' in the sand and when the sea meets the horizon so far out only the shells will understand .
You're running from the waves, you're running from the tide that's changing everyday, so dive straight in you're running out of time, the current's pulling at your mind, so dive straight in. I think that people never change, though it seems like they do like rocks along the beach. We're just slowing rolling by the tide, you'll find the strength is underneath your heart is young but still your body gets older cos i spent too long as a young girl skimming stones 'til the sea begins to grow the clones are waiting by the rocks in the darkness, but i found treasure there amongst them, i'm gonna take it all the way back home the furthest step you take will always be water
So stained your eyes, wipe em clean boy, keep treading water, or you'll sink or never see that face again it's all lies, wipe ‘em clean boy, you'll preach in danger but don't you dare, no don't you dare pretend. You're running from the waves, you're running from the tide that's changing every day, so dive straight in. You're running out of time, the current's pulling at your mind, so dive straight in
You're running from the waves, you're running from the tide that's changing everyday, so dive straight in you're running out of time, the current's pulling at your mind, so dive straight in. I think that people never change, though it seems like they do like rocks along the beach. We're just slowing rolling by the tide, you'll find the strength is underneath your heart is young but still your body gets older cos i spent too long as a young girl skimming stones 'til the sea begins to grow the clones are waiting by the rocks in the darkness, but i found treasure there amongst them, i'm gonna take it all the way back home the furthest step you take will always be water
So stained your eyes, wipe em clean boy, keep treading water, or you'll sink or never see that face again it's all lies, wipe ‘em clean boy, you'll preach in danger but don't you dare, no don't you dare pretend. You're running from the waves, you're running from the tide that's changing every day, so dive straight in. You're running out of time, the current's pulling at your mind, so dive straight in
Monday, March 23, 2009
The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
Admiration for a quality or an art can be so strong that it deters us from striving to possess it.
All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking.
And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
At times one remains faithful to a cause only because its opponents do not cease to
Glance into the world just as though time were gone: and everything crooked will become straight to you.
Admiration for a quality or an art can be so strong that it deters us from striving to possess it.
All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking.
And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you.
And we should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.
At times one remains faithful to a cause only because its opponents do not cease to
Glance into the world just as though time were gone: and everything crooked will become straight to you.
Friday, March 20, 2009
So i had this dream last night. I was at V festival and I was sitting in a chair with my mum and dad who were drinking coffee. Then the guitars from half full glass of wine-tame impala started to play and heaps of people started running to the stage and so I started running aswell, weirdly enough danny from channel v aka danny deckchair was running infront of me and i said oh hey danny but he ignored me so i was like yeah up yours too. Then there were two massive crowds of people either side of the stage but there was a middle part and there was only about 10 people there so i ran into there beating danny haha.
Everyone was singing along to the dun dun dun dun part of the guitar and I was standing front row, with hardly anyone around me except for danny who was about 5 metres behind me there was only a little bit of string separating me and andrew stockdale and then a bit more string separating him from tame impala. I was taking photos etc. and then he came up to sing some awful whiney song one which sounded really pop melodramatic cry baby like then some aboriginal guy came and sang after him and i think this is because i brought my nana that aboriginal guys cd who was in the charts recently. Anyway I ended up leaving during his set and then I got home and realised I hadn't seen the killers and I got so pissed off and was complaining to my mum why I missed them etc. and she said "Oh theyve been up north so they probably would be any good either"
I was completely devastated, as the whole main reason i'm going to v fest is to see them because they are my favourite. Anyway that was the end of my dream, weird isnt it. that definately won't be happening on the day, although im definately not opposed to being front row with hardly anyone around me haha that would be fantastic. Today I went to victoria park and went to look in some shops there wasnt much there so i went with mum to get a salad roll from our friend lola's shop. Some guy asked us if there was a hair dresser in the shopping centre and i had no idea it was very strange.. I wonder if he was going to get his hair 'styled' haha. Ok thats it. I still havent watched all of December Boys yet, its an alright movie except I cant get my head over the fact that Harry Potter (Dan radcliffe) puts on an aussie accent. Sometimes it actually sounds aussie which is the strangest part.
Everyone was singing along to the dun dun dun dun part of the guitar and I was standing front row, with hardly anyone around me except for danny who was about 5 metres behind me there was only a little bit of string separating me and andrew stockdale and then a bit more string separating him from tame impala. I was taking photos etc. and then he came up to sing some awful whiney song one which sounded really pop melodramatic cry baby like then some aboriginal guy came and sang after him and i think this is because i brought my nana that aboriginal guys cd who was in the charts recently. Anyway I ended up leaving during his set and then I got home and realised I hadn't seen the killers and I got so pissed off and was complaining to my mum why I missed them etc. and she said "Oh theyve been up north so they probably would be any good either"
I was completely devastated, as the whole main reason i'm going to v fest is to see them because they are my favourite. Anyway that was the end of my dream, weird isnt it. that definately won't be happening on the day, although im definately not opposed to being front row with hardly anyone around me haha that would be fantastic. Today I went to victoria park and went to look in some shops there wasnt much there so i went with mum to get a salad roll from our friend lola's shop. Some guy asked us if there was a hair dresser in the shopping centre and i had no idea it was very strange.. I wonder if he was going to get his hair 'styled' haha. Ok thats it. I still havent watched all of December Boys yet, its an alright movie except I cant get my head over the fact that Harry Potter (Dan radcliffe) puts on an aussie accent. Sometimes it actually sounds aussie which is the strangest part.
Friday, March 13, 2009
I'm quite excited, I've made up my mind that I'm going to do a Diploma in Mass Communications and Media which has film aspects to it for about 7-8 months and then go into my university degree. If I really do like it I'm thinking about going to university in london. Goldsmiths has caught my attention but there are a couple of others aswell. I still havent finished sifting through them but they all seem so amazing, it would be hard picking one if I did decide to do that I'm also considering France but I think that would be hard to understand I'd definately have to learn french before I left.
I awake to find no peace of mind. I said how do you live as a fugitive? Down here, where I cannot see so clear I said what do I know? show me the right way to go. And the spies came out of the water,but you're feeling so bad coz you know and the spies hide out in every corner but you can't touch them no, coz they're all spies.
They're all spies.
I awake to see that no one is free we're all fugitives look at the way we live down here, I cannot sleep from fear.I said which way do I turn? Oh I forget everything I learn. And if we don't hide here, they're gonna find us and if we don't hide now, they're gonna catch us when we sleep and if we don't hide here, they're gonna find us.
They're all spies.
I awake to see that no one is free we're all fugitives look at the way we live down here, I cannot sleep from fear.I said which way do I turn? Oh I forget everything I learn. And if we don't hide here, they're gonna find us and if we don't hide now, they're gonna catch us when we sleep and if we don't hide here, they're gonna find us.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Mousey in the Housey
Ok, so theres been a mouse in our hosue for 2 days now. We put traps out etc but the little bugger still hasnt been caught, as much as I hate mice being caught in traps i dont fancy one coming up and nibbling on my head when Im asleep.
Yesterday after going for a jog with my ipod and dog, I came home took my shoes off and went in my room oblivious to the fact that a big fat mouse trap was in the middle of my room. I stepped onto it and it got me! hahahaa. It didnt really hurt I have to say but it did leave a bit of blood on my foot only a tiny amount though quite embarassing and funny at the same time.
Anyway today I went to the beach with mum, ziggy(my dog) and tess(nanas dog) which was so nice because the water was like glass, we ended up seeing 3 dolphins in the water and had a swim at the end of it. About 10 minutes ago we went to civic and got some dvds as its cheapo $1 dvd tuesdays and before that a fire truck came whizzing past us. Then coming home we noticed a big puffball of smoke near the direction of our house which was a bit worrying seemings we live in the bush etc. It actually isnt that far from my house, probably about 10kms away? Yeah. Also big helicopters and planes keep coming over to go drop water etc, its a bit of a worry because its quite hot outside and the wind is starting to pick up a bit. eek haha could you imagine, everyone has kept saying because of the victorian bushfires etc asking us what we would do if a fire came here. Definately not stay and protect the house i mean its just a house at the end of the day haha just take the dog and gooooooooo.Now Im off to go on twitter :P I never really liked it but now its getting quite interesting. kk byex
Yesterday after going for a jog with my ipod and dog, I came home took my shoes off and went in my room oblivious to the fact that a big fat mouse trap was in the middle of my room. I stepped onto it and it got me! hahahaa. It didnt really hurt I have to say but it did leave a bit of blood on my foot only a tiny amount though quite embarassing and funny at the same time.
Anyway today I went to the beach with mum, ziggy(my dog) and tess(nanas dog) which was so nice because the water was like glass, we ended up seeing 3 dolphins in the water and had a swim at the end of it. About 10 minutes ago we went to civic and got some dvds as its cheapo $1 dvd tuesdays and before that a fire truck came whizzing past us. Then coming home we noticed a big puffball of smoke near the direction of our house which was a bit worrying seemings we live in the bush etc. It actually isnt that far from my house, probably about 10kms away? Yeah. Also big helicopters and planes keep coming over to go drop water etc, its a bit of a worry because its quite hot outside and the wind is starting to pick up a bit. eek haha could you imagine, everyone has kept saying because of the victorian bushfires etc asking us what we would do if a fire came here. Definately not stay and protect the house i mean its just a house at the end of the day haha just take the dog and gooooooooo.Now Im off to go on twitter :P I never really liked it but now its getting quite interesting. kk byex
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Ponderous
This is ponderous man. Really ponderous.
I had this dream the other night
I went to work, but nobody remembered who I was, so
I decided to take the day off On my way out, I ran into my boss
He said, Hey, you look familiar.
I said Thanks, people say that alot in these dreams
And then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Then all of the sudden, I find myself on some faraway tropical beach And there's this sign there that says Aren't you supposed to be at work? Sort of screamed out at me Then I remembered. I'd been here before in other dreams. Usually there was a water polo game and a girl who could talk with her eyes. And she'd say, 'Can you see what I'm saying?'
And then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Then I find myself walking near this lake And the phone rings
And the operator speaks to me in a language I don't understand
Ooom poppa chikamaga wana sing gow
Do lomma sinnigama mana ching jow
Inimana choogamaga wana sing gee
Finimana foonimana one is now free
Then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Now we're coming up on this really wierd part of my dream. You know, the part where I know how to tapdance. But I can only do it while wearing golf shoes then I'm walking again with the girl who can talk with her eyes.
This time she says, 'I think you see what I'm saying'
Then just before I woke up, it started to rain in southern california
Ooom poppa chikamaga wana sing gow
Do lomma sinnigama mana ching jow
Inimana choogamaga wana sing gee
Finimana foonimana one is now free
Aren't you supposed to be at work?
The girl who could talk with her eyes.
'Can you see what I'm saying?'
This is ponderous man, really ponderous
I had this dream the other night
I went to work, but nobody remembered who I was, so
I decided to take the day off On my way out, I ran into my boss
He said, Hey, you look familiar.
I said Thanks, people say that alot in these dreams
And then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Then all of the sudden, I find myself on some faraway tropical beach And there's this sign there that says Aren't you supposed to be at work? Sort of screamed out at me Then I remembered. I'd been here before in other dreams. Usually there was a water polo game and a girl who could talk with her eyes. And she'd say, 'Can you see what I'm saying?'
And then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Then I find myself walking near this lake And the phone rings
And the operator speaks to me in a language I don't understand
Ooom poppa chikamaga wana sing gow
Do lomma sinnigama mana ching jow
Inimana choogamaga wana sing gee
Finimana foonimana one is now free
Then the horns kicked in
And my shoes started to squeak
Now we're coming up on this really wierd part of my dream. You know, the part where I know how to tapdance. But I can only do it while wearing golf shoes then I'm walking again with the girl who can talk with her eyes.
This time she says, 'I think you see what I'm saying'
Then just before I woke up, it started to rain in southern california
Ooom poppa chikamaga wana sing gow
Do lomma sinnigama mana ching jow
Inimana choogamaga wana sing gee
Finimana foonimana one is now free
Aren't you supposed to be at work?
The girl who could talk with her eyes.
'Can you see what I'm saying?'
This is ponderous man, really ponderous
Friday, March 6, 2009
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
What are you wearing now? hahaha! trackies and a singlet
What’s the last thing you read/are currently reading? Twilight, I know Im sad. I diss it all the time. and I've read about 1/4 of it, at least its more than my cheapo harry potter book I read the first page and got bored
Do you nap a lot? No, never
Who was the last person you hugged? Madge.
What’s your current obsession/addiction? Pretty males, haah probably franz ferdinand and cooking.
Which item from your closet are you wearing most lately? nike shirts from new york
What's for dinner? pasta with italian sausage YUMMAY
What was the last thing you bought? shoes from urban outfitters in la
What are you listening to right now? Ulysses-Franz Ferdinand
If you could have any super power, what would it be? To fly, obviously then I wouldnt have to be worried about crashing. Or to read peoples minds, but only when I want to.
What is your favorite weather, and why? SPRING!
What time do you usually get up? 1030ish lately, but the last couple of days its been about 9ish annoying!
What is your most challenging goal right now? Actually doing SOMETHING
If you could have a house–totally paid for, fully furnished–anywhere in the world, where would you want it to be? Montenegro by the lake, or lake como, or anywhere in france, or LA or Miami. Anywhere like that hahaha
Favorite vacation spot? Miami and LA LALA
What is your favorite item of clothing? I really like my shirt that has some chicks mega face on it but i dont like her face or anything i just like the way it sits. hahaa like you know what im on about
Favorite pair of shoes you keep going back to over and over, even though your closet is overflowing with a zillion others: Thongs HAHAHAHA, and my gladiators.
Name one thing you cannot live without: Connection. Social connection. I agree
What time is bed time? Whenever now. Usually around 10:30. I dont know why unless Im watching a movie
If you could wake up anywhere tomorrow morning, where would it be? France :) In the summer next to a lake.
What’s the last thing you read/are currently reading? Twilight, I know Im sad. I diss it all the time. and I've read about 1/4 of it, at least its more than my cheapo harry potter book I read the first page and got bored
Do you nap a lot? No, never
Who was the last person you hugged? Madge.
What’s your current obsession/addiction? Pretty males, haah probably franz ferdinand and cooking.
Which item from your closet are you wearing most lately? nike shirts from new york
What's for dinner? pasta with italian sausage YUMMAY
What was the last thing you bought? shoes from urban outfitters in la
What are you listening to right now? Ulysses-Franz Ferdinand
If you could have any super power, what would it be? To fly, obviously then I wouldnt have to be worried about crashing. Or to read peoples minds, but only when I want to.
What is your favorite weather, and why? SPRING!
What time do you usually get up? 1030ish lately, but the last couple of days its been about 9ish annoying!
What is your most challenging goal right now? Actually doing SOMETHING
If you could have a house–totally paid for, fully furnished–anywhere in the world, where would you want it to be? Montenegro by the lake, or lake como, or anywhere in france, or LA or Miami. Anywhere like that hahaha
Favorite vacation spot? Miami and LA LALA
What is your favorite item of clothing? I really like my shirt that has some chicks mega face on it but i dont like her face or anything i just like the way it sits. hahaa like you know what im on about
Favorite pair of shoes you keep going back to over and over, even though your closet is overflowing with a zillion others: Thongs HAHAHAHA, and my gladiators.
Name one thing you cannot live without: Connection. Social connection. I agree
What time is bed time? Whenever now. Usually around 10:30. I dont know why unless Im watching a movie
If you could wake up anywhere tomorrow morning, where would it be? France :) In the summer next to a lake.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Yesterday, mum dad and I went out to lunch at 'cafe cafe' in subiaco. It was ok, not as good as they use to be which is a little too common with restaurants thesedays. We then went and looked at cars in victoria park and I saw Meesha there :) which was nice.
Today we ended up going to my aunties and my nana and great grandma [aka ma] came aswell. Ma has come up to stay with us for the week, we do this every so often to give my nana a break and so ma can come up and look out over the hills etc. as she likes it. Shes such a magnificent person, I really cant describe how fantastic she is. Shes the nicest and kindest person I've ever met, she has nothing negative to say and is always positive. Everything she does is great and whenever she eats she says its the nicest shes ever had. I'm really glad to have such a special person like her and at 94 years of age Im glad to say that I'm related so such a wonderful woman.
I'm sure she's got millions of stories to tell and I'd really like to know every little bit about her history so that I could possibly one day make a movie about her.
Today we ended up going to my aunties and my nana and great grandma [aka ma] came aswell. Ma has come up to stay with us for the week, we do this every so often to give my nana a break and so ma can come up and look out over the hills etc. as she likes it. Shes such a magnificent person, I really cant describe how fantastic she is. Shes the nicest and kindest person I've ever met, she has nothing negative to say and is always positive. Everything she does is great and whenever she eats she says its the nicest shes ever had. I'm really glad to have such a special person like her and at 94 years of age Im glad to say that I'm related so such a wonderful woman.
I'm sure she's got millions of stories to tell and I'd really like to know every little bit about her history so that I could possibly one day make a movie about her.
Saturday, February 28, 2009
You never know what's comin' for ya.
Along the way you bump into people who make a dent on your life. Some people get struck by lightning. Some are born to sit by a river. Some have an ear for music. Some are artists. Some swim the English Channel. Some know buttons. Some know Shakespeare. Some are mothers. And some people can dance.
Your life is defined by its opportunities... even the ones you miss.
You can be as mad as a mad dog at the way things went. You could swear, curse the fates, but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.
Your life is defined by its opportunities... even the ones you miss.
You can be as mad as a mad dog at the way things went. You could swear, curse the fates, but when it comes to the end, you have to let go.
Friday, February 27, 2009
My characters shall have, after a little trouble, all that they desire.
If you held my hand, or kissed my lips. And it all failed. I would still want to only be with you, but to not be a lover to be your friend, forever. And have the occasional awkwardness of your body pressed upon mine as you kissed my lips softly.
You are quite the glorious fascination from my mind. Even though you look like an utter crazed maniac, I cant help but find myself somewhat attracted to you.
You are quite the glorious fascination from my mind. Even though you look like an utter crazed maniac, I cant help but find myself somewhat attracted to you.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Yes Me.
"The power of a photograph, it owns ones memory and releases all happiness."-- C.M.Hayes

















Something as simple as a photograph.
Something as simple as a photograph.
New franz ferdinand!
While I sit in here, a sentimental face stares
And a voice says hi so
So what you gotta what you gotta disdain
C’mon let’s get high
C’mon look so, you got next oh
Walk twenty five miles oh
Well I’m bored I’m bored
C’mon let’s get high
Well I found a new way
I found a new way
C’mon doll and use me
I don’t need your sympathy
La, la la la la
Ulysses
I’ll find a new way
I’ll find a new way, baby
My Ulysses, My Ulysses
No, bet you are now, boy
So sinister, so sinister
Last night was wild
What’s a matter there, feeling kinda anxious?
That heart that grew cold
Yeah everyone, everybody knows it
Yeah everyone, everybody know it
Everybody knows I
La, la la la la
Ulysses
I’ll find a new way
I’ll find a new way, baby
Oh, then suddenly you know
You’re never going home
You’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never
You’re never going home.
Not Ulysses, baby.
No, la la la la whooo whoo
You’re not Ulysses, whooo whoo
La la la la, whooo whoo
And a voice says hi so
So what you gotta what you gotta disdain
C’mon let’s get high
C’mon look so, you got next oh
Walk twenty five miles oh
Well I’m bored I’m bored
C’mon let’s get high
Well I found a new way
I found a new way
C’mon doll and use me
I don’t need your sympathy
La, la la la la
Ulysses
I’ll find a new way
I’ll find a new way, baby
My Ulysses, My Ulysses
No, bet you are now, boy
So sinister, so sinister
Last night was wild
What’s a matter there, feeling kinda anxious?
That heart that grew cold
Yeah everyone, everybody knows it
Yeah everyone, everybody know it
Everybody knows I
La, la la la la
Ulysses
I’ll find a new way
I’ll find a new way, baby
Oh, then suddenly you know
You’re never going home
You’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never you’re never
You’re never going home.
Not Ulysses, baby.
No, la la la la whooo whoo
You’re not Ulysses, whooo whoo
La la la la, whooo whoo
I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.
To sit in the shade on a fine day, and look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment.
Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?
One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
Everybody likes to go their own way--to choose their own time and manner of devotion.
If any one faculty of our nature may be called more wonderful than the rest, I do think it is memory. There seems something more speakingly incomprehensible in the powers, the failures, the inequalities of memory, than in any other of our intelligences. The memory is sometimes so retentive, so serviceable, so obedient; at others, so bewildered and so weak; and at others again, so tyrannic, so beyond control! We are, to be sure, a miracle every way; but our powers of recollecting and of forgetting do seem peculiarly past finding out.
Nothing amuses me more than the easy manner with which everybody settles the abundance of those who have a great deal less than themselves.
There will be little rubs and disappointments everywhere, and we are all apt to expect too much; but then, if one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better: we find comfort somewhere.
To sit in the shade on a fine day, and look upon verdure is the most perfect refreshment.
Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?
One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
Everybody likes to go their own way--to choose their own time and manner of devotion.
If any one faculty of our nature may be called more wonderful than the rest, I do think it is memory. There seems something more speakingly incomprehensible in the powers, the failures, the inequalities of memory, than in any other of our intelligences. The memory is sometimes so retentive, so serviceable, so obedient; at others, so bewildered and so weak; and at others again, so tyrannic, so beyond control! We are, to be sure, a miracle every way; but our powers of recollecting and of forgetting do seem peculiarly past finding out.
Nothing amuses me more than the easy manner with which everybody settles the abundance of those who have a great deal less than themselves.
There will be little rubs and disappointments everywhere, and we are all apt to expect too much; but then, if one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better: we find comfort somewhere.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Today I went to Belmont with mum. I brought some high heels and looked at some stuff around etc. Brought some fish and paprika to make dinner from a recipe tonight. I also made my chocolate fudge, which tastes delicious I must say :)
The other day we went to the beach because Ziggy finally got her stitches out. I have to say after not going for 2 weeks it felt like I hadn't been to the beach for 2 years and I was craving it ever so much. I dont think I could live far from the beach, ever. Or at least far from some form of water may it be a pool, lake or the beach. I do have to say the beach is nicest followed by the pool and then the lake because sometimes Im not quite sure what's awaiting me at the bottom.
I started looking at old scripts that I had written about 2 pages of then quit, I have to say they were quite good and the memories came flushing through my head. I started a new one the other day and its going quite well. I think I'll chip in a little bit each day or days when I have a revelation. I usually get most of my ideas when I'm in bed which is annoying but I repeat them in my mind about 3 or 4 times so I remember them when I wake up.
Anyway I'm going to help make this fish paprika thing with spicy cherry tomato salsa :)
Byex
The best things to ever happen to us often become a blur. The things that make us laugh so often become predictable. We begin to forget what first caught our attention. We start to take advantage because we feel it will always be there.
Unfortunately, one day its not. And its not until its taken away that we realise just how lucky we were. How we were some what dependant on it. And how hollow we feel with out it.
There arn't that many genuine happenings, so when you find one. Nurture it
Unfortunately, one day its not. And its not until its taken away that we realise just how lucky we were. How we were some what dependant on it. And how hollow we feel with out it.
There arn't that many genuine happenings, so when you find one. Nurture it
I can't, I can't get through
I've been trying hard to reach you
Cos I don't know what to do
Oh brother I can't believe it's true
I'm so scared about the future and
I want to talk to you
Oh I want to talk to you
You can take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung, or do
Something that's never been done
Are you lost or incomplete?
Do you feel like a puzzle?
You can't find your missing piece
Tell me how do you feel?
Well I feel like they're talking in a language I don't speak
And they're talking it to me
So you take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung, or do
Something that's never been done, or do
Something that's never been done
So you don't know where you're going
But you want to talk
And you feel like you're going where you've been before
You'll tell anyone who will listen but you feel ignored
Nothing's really making any sense at all
Let's talk
Under the great North star
Try to work out where you are
In the silence of the sea
I don't know where I'll be
In the future, in the past
Going nowhere, much too fast
When I go there, go with me
'Cause I don't know where I'm going and I wanna talk
I feel like I'm going where I've been before
And I wanna talk
Take a picture of something that you're not sure of
Bring it back to show to me
But I don't know what I see
In the future, find a home
Getting nowhere on your own
Got to find your missing piece
'Cause you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Nothing's really making any sense at all
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored
Let's talk
I'm up in the party floor
I'm trying to sing a song
In a language I don't speak
I tried but I can't get through
I'm trying to get to you
But you’re difficult to reach
Won't you talk to me
So you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Let's talk
I've been trying hard to reach you
Cos I don't know what to do
Oh brother I can't believe it's true
I'm so scared about the future and
I want to talk to you
Oh I want to talk to you
You can take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung, or do
Something that's never been done
Are you lost or incomplete?
Do you feel like a puzzle?
You can't find your missing piece
Tell me how do you feel?
Well I feel like they're talking in a language I don't speak
And they're talking it to me
So you take a picture of something you see
In the future where will I be?
You can climb a ladder up to the sun
Or write a song nobody has sung, or do
Something that's never been done, or do
Something that's never been done
So you don't know where you're going
But you want to talk
And you feel like you're going where you've been before
You'll tell anyone who will listen but you feel ignored
Nothing's really making any sense at all
Let's talk
Under the great North star
Try to work out where you are
In the silence of the sea
I don't know where I'll be
In the future, in the past
Going nowhere, much too fast
When I go there, go with me
'Cause I don't know where I'm going and I wanna talk
I feel like I'm going where I've been before
And I wanna talk
Take a picture of something that you're not sure of
Bring it back to show to me
But I don't know what I see
In the future, find a home
Getting nowhere on your own
Got to find your missing piece
'Cause you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Nothing's really making any sense at all
You tell anyone who'll listen but you feel ignored
Let's talk
I'm up in the party floor
I'm trying to sing a song
In a language I don't speak
I tried but I can't get through
I'm trying to get to you
But you’re difficult to reach
Won't you talk to me
So you don't know were you're going and you wanna talk
You feel like you're going where you've been before
Let's talk
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Childs Play
Isn't it funny how when you're home you want to be whisked away to some dream like vacation and then when your on vacation you would like to be home? I think if I did go to France it would be different. Theres something about the whole region that makes me just want to go and stay and live for a while. Maybe not right now, maybe when I'm in my 30s or late 20s after making a few films and enjoying myself I'll go settle down in France.

Something like this, just a little house in france overlooking a lake or something like that.

How amazing would it be
Something like this, just a little house in france overlooking a lake or something like that.
How amazing would it be
Sunday, February 8, 2009
There is only one sin, only one. And that is theft. Every other sin is a variation of theft... When you kill a man, you steal a life. You steal his wife's right to a husband, rob his children of a father. When you tell a lie, you steal someone's right to the truth. When you cheat, you steal the right to fairness.
If we come to sleep We are His drowsy ones. And if we come to wake We are in His hands. If we come to weeping, We are His cloud full of raindrops. And if we come to laughing, We are His lightning in that moment. If we come to anger and battle, It is the reflection of His wrath. And if we come to peace and pardon, It is the reflection of His love. Who are we in this complicated world?
When you look at your life, in a strange new room, maybe drowning soon, is this the start of it all?
If we come to sleep We are His drowsy ones. And if we come to wake We are in His hands. If we come to weeping, We are His cloud full of raindrops. And if we come to laughing, We are His lightning in that moment. If we come to anger and battle, It is the reflection of His wrath. And if we come to peace and pardon, It is the reflection of His love. Who are we in this complicated world?
When you look at your life, in a strange new room, maybe drowning soon, is this the start of it all?
I've started having THE most vivid dreams at around 4am when i finally get off to sleep. I am starting to surprise myself in that the seemingly unimportant topics that i leave at the back of my brain from 7am to midnight seem to push their way into my subconcious once i hit the hay, and the people I end up dreaming about happen to be people I don't have much respect for.
Although this wasn't the case last night. I was in LA again for some very weird reason in a little op shop but it was an outside opshop like the markets you find but things were hanging on book like shelves. Actually they were exactly like those shelves you find in IKEA! Then I saw this taxi and who happened to be waiting for a taxi? KOBE BRYANT (MVP-Most Valuable Player in the NBA and plays for the LA Lakers which I saw in LA when I was there) Anyway he looked at me I looked at him and smiled and then he got into the taxi with a few other guys from the basketball team as they were all wearing their jerseys. I never went over for an autograph or picture just like when I saw Christina Ricci in the supermarket at LA - Although that was real life, and if I did see Kobe Bryant in real life I definately would get a picture.
Then for some weird reason I went into a church which wasnt really like a church and went up for holy communion? I think thats what its called when you go up and they put that white thing in your mouth except when I did it I had no idea what to do with it and it ended up sticking to the roof of my mouth like an old old old chewie and I couldnt get it out until I walked out of the church and pulled it out of my mouth with my hand. Then I walked back in and saw Kobe Bryant there for the second time that day, he was now wearing a Cleveland jersey which is extremely odd seemings I could never imagine him playing for Cleveland. Anyway he looked at me again and we started to chat then he gave me his jersey and signed it and we agreed to catch up later and then he went back out the church into his taxi. A few minutes later I found myself on the sidewalk with a black pen foreging his signature on my jersey about 20 times and then I turned the jersey to the back and what name did it have on the back? LeBRON! (For those who dont know, LeBron is a great NBA player aswell except he isnt as good as Bryant) And then that was the end of my wacky wacky tobacky dream.
Obviously there are details that I won't ever remember again unless I end up returning to the exact same scene on another occasion. Occasionelly I am questioning whether I am even playing myself in my own dreams.
Anyway the bbq at Mike + Brendas was nice today, it wasnt windy like it had been and we all sat out on the balcony overlooking the beach which was wonderful. It also had me regretting that I didnt wear my bathers I should know by now that whenever I'm near any form of water I really want to go for a swim. Like my nana and mum always say I was born a water baby haha.
I'm watching The Kite Runner tonight which is a movie my mum rented out on $1 Tuesdays at civic along with 5 others that we picked. I still have to watch my movie tomorrow before it goes back on tuesday and I pick another bunch of $1 movies to watch for the week. I really have become obsessed with movies though, maybe I really was meant to do this thing. Oh and I found a good job on the site seek which has my name written all over it, they are a promotional magazine which are turning into film distribution and even though its just an intern job which means doing general office shit, it will give me good contacts for the future :) Ill put in my CV tomorrow
KK
bye
Although this wasn't the case last night. I was in LA again for some very weird reason in a little op shop but it was an outside opshop like the markets you find but things were hanging on book like shelves. Actually they were exactly like those shelves you find in IKEA! Then I saw this taxi and who happened to be waiting for a taxi? KOBE BRYANT (MVP-Most Valuable Player in the NBA and plays for the LA Lakers which I saw in LA when I was there) Anyway he looked at me I looked at him and smiled and then he got into the taxi with a few other guys from the basketball team as they were all wearing their jerseys. I never went over for an autograph or picture just like when I saw Christina Ricci in the supermarket at LA - Although that was real life, and if I did see Kobe Bryant in real life I definately would get a picture.
Then for some weird reason I went into a church which wasnt really like a church and went up for holy communion? I think thats what its called when you go up and they put that white thing in your mouth except when I did it I had no idea what to do with it and it ended up sticking to the roof of my mouth like an old old old chewie and I couldnt get it out until I walked out of the church and pulled it out of my mouth with my hand. Then I walked back in and saw Kobe Bryant there for the second time that day, he was now wearing a Cleveland jersey which is extremely odd seemings I could never imagine him playing for Cleveland. Anyway he looked at me again and we started to chat then he gave me his jersey and signed it and we agreed to catch up later and then he went back out the church into his taxi. A few minutes later I found myself on the sidewalk with a black pen foreging his signature on my jersey about 20 times and then I turned the jersey to the back and what name did it have on the back? LeBRON! (For those who dont know, LeBron is a great NBA player aswell except he isnt as good as Bryant) And then that was the end of my wacky wacky tobacky dream.
Obviously there are details that I won't ever remember again unless I end up returning to the exact same scene on another occasion. Occasionelly I am questioning whether I am even playing myself in my own dreams.
Anyway the bbq at Mike + Brendas was nice today, it wasnt windy like it had been and we all sat out on the balcony overlooking the beach which was wonderful. It also had me regretting that I didnt wear my bathers I should know by now that whenever I'm near any form of water I really want to go for a swim. Like my nana and mum always say I was born a water baby haha.
I'm watching The Kite Runner tonight which is a movie my mum rented out on $1 Tuesdays at civic along with 5 others that we picked. I still have to watch my movie tomorrow before it goes back on tuesday and I pick another bunch of $1 movies to watch for the week. I really have become obsessed with movies though, maybe I really was meant to do this thing. Oh and I found a good job on the site seek which has my name written all over it, they are a promotional magazine which are turning into film distribution and even though its just an intern job which means doing general office shit, it will give me good contacts for the future :) Ill put in my CV tomorrow
KK
bye
Friday, February 6, 2009
HAPPY GO LUCKY MAN, AND THE OWNER OF SKULLS TAVERN.
I WOULD NEVER HAD THOUGHT IT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME, BUT ON MAY THE 26TH 2008 I MET MY TRUE LOVE AND SOUL MATE (JENNYfromtheblock)
THIS LADY IS SO WONDERFUL AND CARING.
I THANK MY LUCKY STARS THAT SHE CAME INTO MY TAVERN AND LIFE.
SO IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW LIFE CAN BRING YOU DOWN, ALWAYS LOOK UP TO THE SKY AND YOU TO MIGHT FIND ANGEL LIKE MY JENNY.
WHO LOVE ME FOR ME AND NOT FOR MY GOOD LOOKS AND MONEY. LOL.
I Truely Am The Luckyest Man On Earth.
On The 13th Of July 2008 My love JENNY The Most Wonderful Lady And Angel Asked Me To Marry Her In My Tavern On Mic And I Said Yes.
Plus She Have Me The Most Amazing Ring I Have Ever Had And Im So Proud To Wear It.
JENNY Darling You Are Truely A Angel Sent From Above.
I Hope I Never Lose You XXXXXX.
Then On The 26th Of September 2008 Jenny And I Took Our Next Path To Our eternal Love For Each Other We Got Engaged Leaving Only One More Path To Fullfill Out Happiness.
I WOULD NEVER HAD THOUGHT IT WOULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME, BUT ON MAY THE 26TH 2008 I MET MY TRUE LOVE AND SOUL MATE (JENNYfromtheblock)
THIS LADY IS SO WONDERFUL AND CARING.
I THANK MY LUCKY STARS THAT SHE CAME INTO MY TAVERN AND LIFE.
SO IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW LIFE CAN BRING YOU DOWN, ALWAYS LOOK UP TO THE SKY AND YOU TO MIGHT FIND ANGEL LIKE MY JENNY.
WHO LOVE ME FOR ME AND NOT FOR MY GOOD LOOKS AND MONEY. LOL.
I Truely Am The Luckyest Man On Earth.
On The 13th Of July 2008 My love JENNY The Most Wonderful Lady And Angel Asked Me To Marry Her In My Tavern On Mic And I Said Yes.
Plus She Have Me The Most Amazing Ring I Have Ever Had And Im So Proud To Wear It.
JENNY Darling You Are Truely A Angel Sent From Above.
I Hope I Never Lose You XXXXXX.
Then On The 26th Of September 2008 Jenny And I Took Our Next Path To Our eternal Love For Each Other We Got Engaged Leaving Only One More Path To Fullfill Out Happiness.
I'm going to watch Lords of Dogtown again today. Actually in a couple of minutes when my stupid slow facebook photos upload!
I woke up at 11am which is quite late seemings I hardly ever sleep in, even though I had a bad night of waking up multiple times so I guess the sleep in wasnt much of a sleep in. I watched about 2 minutes of tv and then came on here, looked at peoples myspace profiles added my new french friend on facebook and thats basically it. Tonight we're going to my aunties for my nanas bday etc. you get the jist of things.
Anyway I'm off to go watch that movie, I still have CONTROL from civic and its due back tuesday. Im not sure when I'll end up watching that. I hope work wasnt too bad :] and hopefully you had a good night the other night.
ahh havent seen you in a whole week it kind of feels like a month hahaha
k
Bye
I woke up at 11am which is quite late seemings I hardly ever sleep in, even though I had a bad night of waking up multiple times so I guess the sleep in wasnt much of a sleep in. I watched about 2 minutes of tv and then came on here, looked at peoples myspace profiles added my new french friend on facebook and thats basically it. Tonight we're going to my aunties for my nanas bday etc. you get the jist of things.
Anyway I'm off to go watch that movie, I still have CONTROL from civic and its due back tuesday. Im not sure when I'll end up watching that. I hope work wasnt too bad :] and hopefully you had a good night the other night.
ahh havent seen you in a whole week it kind of feels like a month hahaha
k
Bye
First Day
Today was a nice day, it wasnt too hot and wasnt too cold. I woke up around 9 oclock and had a hair appointment in innaloo or somewhere like that at 11.25 with mummah. We went there, I got my hair cut and then we went to ikea as I wanted to change my room up a little bit. No success there, and seemings I utterly despise ikea I was pretty good about it all. There weren't many kids with ADD today thank god! Seemings they have all been locked up by the evil rulers (school). We then got a hotdog which was disgusting, and I ate 1/4 of it then I felt sick and didnt want anymore.
Then had to take a DVD back from civic and I brought a loaf of bread for mumzar. That was basically my day in a nutshell. When I got home I called Franklyn White about murdoch and he gave me some advice, and Im planning on making a meeting with some girl called Carole and hopefully she can help me out. Then I just cruised the net looking at various peoples blogs and alot of english peoples myspace's which are quite cool. I have the sudden urge to go to France, maybe its my new encounters with parisian friends :p.
Mum Dad and I took ziggy for a walk as we regularly do every night now which is kind of annoying but I always seem to feel better after walking in the bush and then going up the massive hill. I just had boiled eggs and soldiers :) A perfect ending to my little brittish day hahaha. It made me feel like a little kid again and it was so nice! Anyway thats it for now, tomorrow is my nanas birthday party and then Im going for a BBQ on sunday at our friends house who live right near the beach which will be nice.
Bye
x
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