I had the most amazingly real dream the other night. It was so hot and awesomely awesome I'm not sure if I can even remember it, seemings it was almost a month ago. It felt as if they were touching me and I was touching them, everything was real. I awoke to find my arms clinging onto my doonah and even that felt so real. There was so much passion and love and tenison everything was so perfect and clear. Your arms cascaded over mine, over my body touching my face and then your lips leapt into mine it was truly beautiful. If only I knew who you were or how I could experience this again. I cannot explain how it happened or why. Alas I hope I do not forget or that it does never forget me. I really love writing, I cannot explain how it makes me feel to write a story to hear a story to be living a life in a story filled with other stories. I wish one could make a living off just writing things like this, like in the olden days where poems and stories and small securities could be let out into the world and be recognized. Now all thats left is meaningless blogs filled with meaningless words about somebodies day which will be repeated time and time again to the same bunch of people who have been sucked into living a lie that their dreams and goals cannot be reached so they make new ones. I am lucky not to have comprimised myself, I'm still going for the same things I wanted I'm following my dreams and I'm determined on getting there. Maybe thats whats different to the people who make it and the people who dont, determination, and alas great minds. I long to feel the subtle kiss of someone who loves me and that I actually love in return. I could never marry somebody that I didnt love, you could be the poorest man on the earth and it still wouldn't turn me off if you had the right personality. Maybe once this operation is done, or once I voice my opinion on wanting it to be done I could have that. Essentially I wanted someone who loved me for me but I'm getting this surgery for me. I really liked that boy at bunnings he was cute, even smiled at me it was nice. Nice to see that I could actually be appreciated. I hope I make everything I want I hope I be everything I want I hope I never compromise for anything I want overall I hope I make myself happy with the life that I choose to live. My writing is actually quite good, Jane Austen brings out the author in me. Too bad they arent appreciated anymore.
I think if anything was on repeat for long enough you would eventually get sick of it. Unless of course it is with an animal, one can never feel that for an animal.-C M Hayes.
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